The Born-Again Identity

Episode Report Card
Demian: D+ | 5 USERS: A+
Wake Up, Little Hardy Boys

...The Nuthouse, where Wispy Marin arrives at Batshit Sammy's room with yet another offering of supposedly maggot-free candy bars, and the two get to talking -- OF COURSE, AGAIN, SOME MORE -- and we learn that Wispy Marin has been officially diagnosed as a psychotic depressive with suicidal ideation, but really, she's just being bothered by her dead brother's pyromaniac ghost, and no, I'm not kidding with that, at all, and once that's over with, we head back over to...

...this week's crapped-out piece of automotive trash, where Dean and Castiel get to talking -- OF COURSE, AGAIN, SOME MORE, AND AUUUAAUUAUAAAAUUUGH -- about Batshit Sammy's nervous condition, and it all leads to Dean confessing, "This whole thing couldn't be messier, you know? I used to be able to shake this stuff off -- you know, whatever it was -- it might take me some time, but I always could. What Cas did, I just can't -- I don't know why." And I just can't with your heartfelt little confession, honey, and I do know why: Not once during this season did I ever get the impression that Dean hadn't shaken that whole Castiel stuff off, ever. In fact, I do believe he's spent the entire season blaming himself for Batshit Sammy's unfortunate nervous condition -- when said self-censure has been convenient to that week's plot, of course -- so where the hell is all this bullshit angst and betrayal coming from now? Huh? HUH?

Yeah, don't bother answering that, because I really don't care about this, either. You know they're just going to drop it all again after tonight until it's convenient for them to resurrect it later on in the season, so what's the point? Don't believe me? Well, then, I will bet you five dollars cash money they never once -- once -- mention Castiel during next week's episode, despite this evening's supposedly traumatic Castiel-related events. Go on. Bet me. I dare you.

Anyway, where the hell was I? Oh, yeah: So, that ridiculous conversation happens, and then the next thing we know, it's the following morning, and Dashing El Deano is sliding this week's crapped-out piece of automotive trash into a parking space somewhere semi-urban so he might load up on provisions in a nearby convenience store. After instructing My Amnesiac Baboo to remain in the car, Dashing El Deano enters the store all by his lonesome, only to find himself immediately set upon by a trio of demonically-enhanced mooks. Fisticuffs ensue, with Dean quickly taking out the first of the demonically-enhanced mooks with The Knife before the second demonically-enhanced mook bitchslaps The Knife right out of Our Intrepid Hero's hands. D'OH! The third demonically-enhanced mook then advances upon him until a certain mysterious someone retrieves The Knife from the floor to plunge it into the third demonically-enhanced mook's back, at which point the second demonically-enhanced mook drops to his knees, unhinges his temporary host's lower jaw, and unleashes a torrent of bitterly black demonic foulness up towards the convenience store's ceiling. And with that final adversary now roiling its merry way out a nearby window, and with the convenience store's floor now littered with corpses and shattered glass, both Dean and the camera direct their attention towards the certain mysterious someone's Meg! You know, Short-Lip Meg? Meg Masters? Meg who killed Jo Harvelle? Meg who macked on My Sweet Baboo for some bizarre reason way back during season...oh, whenever the hell it was. Yeah, her. "Dean, Dean, Dean," Meg smirks, "you got some 'splaining to do!" Dashing El Deano looks her up and down for one very long moment before we all get booted into this evening's next commercial break most woefully CHOMP!-less.

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