Episode Report Card
Demian: C+ | 4 USERS: A
The Hardy Boys Schedule Vasectomies

Meanwhile, upstairs, The Red-Headed Step-Realtor confronts Darling Sammy. Sam's eyes dart across a nearby sheet of glass that just happens to catch The Realtor's reflection and...she's a soul-sucking Changeling just like the little ones! Only, you know, bigger. With a crappier wig. Sam hems and haws and winces and gulps his remarkably broad-shouldered way into an immensely grateful METAL TEETH CHOMP! I think the METAL TEETH CHOMP! is a Samgirl.

Back from the break, Darling Sammy's still hemming and hawing and wincing and gulping while The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor threatens to call the cops.

Down in the basement, The Great Ankle-Biter Breakout Of 2007 continues apace. Dean is most disturbed, however, to find the real Red-Headed Step-Realtor occupying one of the cages. That doesn't fit the plan!

Upstairs, crafty Sammy craftily retrieves a jury-rigged flamethrower of his own from his backpack and blasts it in The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor's direction, but she's already disappeared! DUN!

Down in the basement, The Great Ankle-Biter Breakout Of 2007 continues apace.

Over at Lisa's tastefully appointed Manse That Yoga Instruction Built, meanwhile, The Demonic Little Bastard's hungry. Uh oh. Lisa rises to bake him a great big pizza pie but startles herself into silence when she spots his reflection's rotting skull-face with lamprey maw in the mirrored coffee table. DUN!

Down in the basement, The Great Ankle-Biter Breakout Of 2007 continues apace. Until The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor arrives to break up all the fun, that is. Demented Diana's actual daughter screams.

The Manse That Yoga Instruction Built. The Demonic Little Bastard, with a little assist from a trio of his dead-eyed friends out on the front lawn, traps Lisa inside the house.

Meanwhile, over at Batshit Acres, Demented Diana's locked herself in the bathroom again and slowly goes even more insane when The Demonic Daughter arrives to pound and kick and scream some more from the hallway outside.

Down in the basement, The Great Ankle-Biter Breakout Of 2007 continues apace. Mainly because The Ginormotron stormed downstairs just ahead of The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor and now hoists all of the ankle-biters out through a shattered window fifteen feet above the basement floor while The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor knocks the crap out of Li'l Stumpy. Oh, sorry. My bad. The Demonic Red-Headed Step-Realtor is actually knocking the crap out of both Our Intrepid Heroes, and it's the remarkably resourceful Little Bastard who's leading the ankle-biters to safety. Whatever. The hand-to-hand's pretty awesome, though. I do so appreciate it when women hand them their tantalizing asses on a platter. "I've noticed that about you!" shrieks Raoul. "I think you have a problem!" Oh, can it, Mr. Big Scary Dragon Who Wets His Pants Whenever A Little Girl Hits The Screen. "Hey!"

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