Episode Report Card
Demian: B- | 3 USERS: A
The Hardy Boys Wanna Take a Ride on Your Disco Stick

No sooner has Castiel realized that his old buddy Belthazor's responsible for this evening's wacky stick-related hijinks than a dark-suited Heavenly traitor flutters into the room to sneer, "Belthazor? Thanks, Castiel -- we'll make good use of the name!" And then? Angel fight! "VIOLENCE!" Yep, Castiel and the Heavenly intruder whip out their Angel-Smiting Scimitars and start hacking away at each other while Sam and Dean stand agog on the sidelines. And because My Sweet Baboo still rivals Darling Sammy with the hand-to-hand suckage, the Heavenly intruder quickly disarms him and stands by the room's sixth-floor window to taunt, "By the way, Raphael says hello!" So My Badass Baboo tackles the guy through the glass. "VIOLENCE! WANTON ACTS OF UNREPENTANT WINDOW-SMASHING VIOLENCE AND GOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" Well, not so much with the gore this time around, Raoul. "Phooey!" But Castiel and the Heavenly intruder do tumble about sixty feet to the ground, where they land on Sam's Charger. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" And well you should shriek at that, friend of friends, for it is awesome. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Of course, The Heavenly Intruder vanishes almost as soon as they've smashed the Charger into tiny little bits, but Castiel has the good grace to shuffle to his feet, dust himself off, and peer up at Our Intrepid Heroes, who are now gawping through the shattered hole where the window used to be. "My car!" Sam whispers, all heartsick and forlorn. "Okay!" Dean mugs. "Silver lining!" Sam's mighty bitchface is both fearsome and immediate, but even it cannot prevent the METAL TEETH CHOMP! from dragging us all into the next commercial break.

This Week's Motel Room. Immediate aftermath. Our Intrepid Heroes stare down at Castiel staring down at the ruins of Sam's Charger until My Sweet Baboo flutters back up into the room behind them. The three immediately start nattering at each other, with Sam and Dean hurling question after question in Castiel's direction while the angel putters about the room, rummaging through duffel bags for supplies. We learn through all of this that the now-vanished dark-suited Heavenly traitor is working for The Archangel Raphael, who returned Up There at some point after the abortive Apocalypse to wrest control of the place now that Michael's locked away in Hell and God is still missing. Raphael's ultimate goal is to restart The Apocalypse by any means necessary -- presumably because he's some sort of traditionalist, or something like that -- and he's managed to assemble a not insignificant force of like-minded angels in order to destroy the planet and whatnot. Most of the other, non-Apocalyptic angels have rallied around My Sweet Baboo in opposition to Raphael, and now Heaven stands at the brink of a civil war, with numerous rogue angels, as mentioned before, choosing to sit it all out this time around by fluttering earthwards with a number of God's most powerful secret weapons. Got all that? "I do not!" Doesn't matter, because I'm sure we'll be reminded of it many, many times throughout the course of the season. "Okay!"

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