Two Minutes To Midnight

Episode Report Card
Demian: B+ | 3 USERS: A+
The Hardy Boys Cut Their Meat and Lick the Gravy

...slips into Dead Celeste's room with the exciting news that the Winchesters have arrived. Then, her eyes flip beetle black as she firmly cautions, "We should go." Pestilence, who'd been calmly wiping the split pea soup from his face and reading glasses, chuckles a bit at his underling's overly cautious manner before snorting, "Are you kidding me?" Nurse Wretched wavers, and hesitantly points out that the boys "have a track record with Horsemen." Pestilence crazies something about what Sam and Dean did to his "brothers," then announces, "The only reasonable thing to do here is to take it out of their healthy young asses." "Dirty!" Not like that, you filthy lizard. "Hee!" In any event, Nurse Wretched delicately reminds her boss, "We're under strict orders not to kill The Vessels!" "If Satan wants them so badly," Pestilence testily replies, "then he can GLUE THEM BACK TOGETHER!" Nurse Wretched's all, "Oooo-kay, freak!" only she's terribly non-verbal about the whole thing, but Pestilence senses her extreme discomfort with his entirely unhinged delivery of that last line, so he encourages her to draw close to him so he might gift her with a soothing, soup-spattered embrace. A soothing, soup-spattered embrace from which he apparently draws some sort of strength, for when Nurse Wretched collapses against him and closes her eyes, Pestilence twists his pale green ring around and... actual doctor elsewhere in the facility hacks up a green lung and drops dead! "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" Meanwhile, the petite brunette nurse he'd been speaking with looks on in horror as a constellation of ragged red blisters erupts up her arms, and as she starts choking on her own blood and bile, or something, the camera zooms in on her terrified face before...

...leaping over to Our Intrepid Heroes, who are still slinking through the halls when Pestilence's rapidly expanding plague waves wash over them! DUN! Their vision goes blurry, and the two start coughing and wheezing into their sleeves, but our foolhardy protagonists soldier on, eventually staggering across the rapidly cooling corpses of the actual doctor and his petite brunette nurse, the latter of whom apparently bled out before dying. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" "We must be getting close," Super-Smart Sammy guesses. "Ya think?" Dean snots back. Like, literally snots back -- he's all but spitting up clots of mucus onto the linoleum at this point. Both are also by now sweating freely, and Dean, apparently bleeding from his gums, eventually slides to the floor, unable to continue. Sam, however, somehow holds himself together long enough to fling open Dead Celeste's door, where he finds Nurse Wretched waiting to greet him. "The doctor will see you now!" she impishly perks. Sam woozily attempts to menace her with The Knife That Can Kill Anything Except When It Usually Can't, but he's really just feverishly flailing about at this point, and barely has Pestilence invited him in than the lurching Ginormotron topples down, and down, and down and down and down and down and down into the METAL TEETH CHOMP!

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