Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B- | 10 USERS: A-
The Hardy Boys Dick Around

Dear Wiccans, I kid, unless you are green, and are in the habit of kidnapping little girls and stealing their snazzy shoes. Then you get the bucket of water. -- Cindy.

Dear Cindy, and Toto too? -- Green Wiccans for Peace and Puppies

The best part of this entire scene is Dean. He's freaking out all the while, hearing and looking at all of Frank's creepy pets. At the end of their discussion, Mark notices Dean eyeing him and his really big boa anaconda constrictor snake, suspiciously. Mark laughs. "Don't be scared of Donny. He's a sweetheart. It's Marie you gotta look out for. She smells fear." I think those dolls do, too. That's the cue for a yellow really big boa anaconda constrictor snake to take a whiff of El Dashing Deano. Marie comes up over the back of the couch and slithers down the entire left-hand side of Dean's body. I'd pegged her for a Dean Girl all along. Dean looks ready to crawl out of his skin and the scene ends not a moment too soon. I have to go shudder for about 10 minutes. BRB.

Hi! It's nighttime now, and Dean's sitting alone in his Baby, reading over something, and scratching furiously at his left arm, and not because he's still skeeved out over Marie. When Sam opens the car door, it startles Dean. They exposit about what little information Dean was able to dig up at the County Clerk's office. Frank's wife Jessie was a manic-depressive who went off her meds in '88, and vanished. "They found her 2 weeks later, 3 towns over, strung up in her motel room. Suicide." Frank's alibi is airtight. He was working the swing shift when Jessie disappeared. Dean drives as Sam catches him up on his investigation of Frank's place. "Clean. No EMF, no hex bags, no sulfur." (Hearing impaired people, the closed captioners lie to you, again. Sam doesn't say "silver".) Dean says, "So probably no ghosts, no witches, no demons. Three down; 97 to go." Sam notices how slowly Dean's driving. "Dude, you're going 20. That's the speed limit." Dean says, "So what -- safety's a crime, now?" They drive past the Bluebird Motel. Wait. It's a hotel. Aren't we coming up in the world? Sam says, "Dude, where are you going? That was our hotel." Dean says, "I'm not going to make a left-hand turn into oncoming traffic. I'm not suicidal!" Sam's EMF reader starts going haywire, and the closer it gets to Dean, the more it reacts. Dean shouts, "Am I haunted? Am I haunted?" Yes you are, Dean -- by the METAL TEETH CHOMP!

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