The Practice
Public Servants

Episode Report Card
Ragdoll: C- | 1 USERS: A+
May he please rest in peace

Previously on The Practice: Jackie Cahill is upset about having to spend thirty years in jail for an “accidental” murder. Richard is attacked and threatened in his garage. After Jackie is finally convicted, the Runt is gunned down in his car by a grandmother and her accomplice.

The Parking Garage of Pain. Third Watch impersonators flit about with stretchers and various other forms of lifesaving equipment. One paramedic explains that Richard “'Twas The Runt Before Execution” Bay has no breath sounds from the right. Detective Mike holds Helen “The Story Of Fuss” Gamble back as the paramedics “roll” Richard’s body out of the car. She pulls away from Mike and says, “I want to see him.” Mike says, “Helen.” She repeats, “I want to see him.” It’s a game of Tug-O-Waif. The Melody Of Multiple Gun Shot Wounds winds its way around the gray garage as the paramedics start “bagging” Richard. The body is bloody. There is blood covering his chest. There is blood covering his head. There is blood all over his suit. Helen and Mike look gravely upon the body. Helen shakes her bony little head. There are no vitals. They call the time of death, and Helen looks rather upset. She chokes out a tear. Her method-acting interior monologue screams, “He’s dead! Oh. God! He’s dead!” As she looks to the left, she tears up again, then looks to the right, waits for a salty one to drop, lets her mouth fall open, and stands there in shock.

I would rather eat nails than listen to the theme song from The Practice. Okay, I know it’s lame, but it’s the end of the season.

The Firm Where They’ve Heard Of Pain. A somber mood overwhelms the office as various members of Team Rod go about their daily workday. Rebecca is packing up her briefcase. Yes, you heard me correctly. I said “Rebecca,” as in “she’s about to actually try a case instead of holding up the scenery.” She poignantly pauses as Rod emerges, looking disheveled, from his inner lair. He places a hand on Rebecca’s shoulder and meekly asks, “Are you okay?” She replies, “Yup.” Then Bobby demands she take a second chair. He tells Ellenor to go with her. Ellenor wants to go check on Helen. Rod insists that his wife can check on Helen. Ellenor again tries to pass the buck to Eugene. In that snotty “King of the Castle” tone, Rod replies, “I didn’t ask Eugene.” Ellenor asks him to ask Eugene. In front of the entire firm, they start bickering about who should go with Rebecca to this trial. Like there aren’t any other lawyers in Boston. Like there isn’t a little thing called a “continuance.” Like Rebecca even cared about Richard. Like the courthouse couldn’t have called a morning of mourning or something. Blah. Bobby and Ellenor continue to bicker until Rod screams, “Why don’t you just do it? Why do I have to fight?” All the time his arms are flailing about like the bullets from last week’s episode. Bam. Out goes the left. Bam. In comes the left. Bam. There goes the right again. The look on Ellenor’s face somewhat resembles the car too: it’s all bent up and out of shape. Lindsay tells Bobby to calm down. But then, in true Lump tradition, Jimmy jumps up and says he’ll second chair. Oddly, Rebecca doesn’t say a peep about Rod’s outburst. She and Jimmy beat a hasty retreat, leaving Eugene and Lindsay staring after Bobby as he walks back into his own personal kind of hell. Hey, do you think he’s taking this badly or what? Do you think he’s in a rage? Huh? And, why, oh why, is everything always each time forever and ever amen ABOUT BOBBY?

The County Jail That Smarts With Jackie’s Pain. A nameless guard leads Helen over to where Jackie’s cell is located. Then she tells the guard to “beat it.” Helen’s heels hit the floor hard as she walks down the hallway. Jackie is sitting on the bed in that prisoner position -- you know, like all the boys from Oz. Helen gives him the cold-fish look. You know, that one where’s she’s a bitch with a vendetta instead of just a regular bitch? Jackie says snidely, “Don’t even bother.” Then he looks away. “I’m represented by counsel.” Hah! She tells him that Bobby’s no longer his lawyer. He tells her to get him somebody else. Helen replies, “I didn’t hear that.” Blah you’re going to tell me who the shooters are blah. Jackie gets up and stretches his body around the bars. He wants to know what she’s going to give him for the information. Helen snorts, “Your life.” Pause. The Jig Of Jackie Cahill is like an electric jolt. Ouch. Oh! The floor is hot! Oh! Feet burning! Ouch! Okay, right, recapping: Helen starts off her bargaining by blackmailing Jackie. See, she’s set up a press conference, and at that press conference she’s going to announce that Jackie agreed to tell the DA’s office who shot Richard. On top of that, she’s also going to tell the press that Jackie gave up all of the other scumballs he does business with -- oh, and then she’s going to release him into the general population. And then, in the words of Helen “Driven” Gamble, “[He’ll] be dead.” Jackie scoffs, “Yeah. Right.” Does he want to call her bluff? Her eyeliner could not be worse in this scene. It looks like roadkill set to burn in the midday sun. Just before she walks away, she says to him, “You are a dead man.” Jackie seems taken with Helen’s offer, because he tells her to get him a lawyer first, and then he’ll consider things.

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The Practice




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