The Practice
The Deal

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Too Many Plots 'R' Us

DA Kate is interrogating Richard. She wants to know if he's questioned Lupino. Then she wants to know how it happened that Francis "lawyered" up immediately. Then she grumps because The Runt arrested Francis in his lawyers' office. Then she wants to know if they've searched his house. Then she screams, "We'd better get her back alive and that's all I've got to say, Richard." Funny, she's been saying a whole lot for the last little while. Richard grovels for a minute. Kate continues, "If she's dead!" Richard interrupts, "Would you stop with the threats and offer some tactical advice!" Then he finally gets a word in edgewise; he'd like Helen "Nurse Bony" Gamble to help him on the case. Kate crosses her arms in front of her chest: "I don't want Helen." Richard gripes, "She's the best DA we have for negotiating with this firm, Kate." Then he yammers on about office politics for a while, rolls his eyes way, way back into his head trying to see Kate from the seated position he's in, and repeats, "Give me Helen Gamble."

Scott Wallace's Palace Of Unemployment. On either side of a very, very long table, Scott, Ellenor, and Jimmy face Wallace's former employer and his lawyer. The lawyer is "unclear" because The Firm claims the discharge of their client was unlawful, and they see no grounds for this complaint. Ellenor wants to work something out. Harry, Scott's boss, steps in to explain that Wallace's position was tenuous even before the trial started. Scott rebuts, "Yes. Finally now I've got the chance to improve on my job performance and I'm being denied that chance." Harry interrupts, "Scott, I'm your friend." Ha! Scott "Another World" Wallace huffs. He starts insisting that Harry abandoned him when he was arrested, and that's not very friendly behaviour. Harry comes back at Ellenor, arguing that he runs an investment firm, and no one is going to trust millions of dollars to someone who might have killed their wife. The Defendant pipes up, "I was acquitted." The Mean Boss snaps back, "You were found not guilty." Whew, finally someone has recognized the slender difference between the two. With all the wins lately, you'd have thought the distinction had disappeared forever. "The Long Day's" Jimmy "Into Night" Berluti reasons, "The thing is, Mr. Duvall, fairness has to come into play here." Harry agrees with Jimmy, but he does have a firm to run. Scott wounds himself verbally for a couple of seconds, and Ellenor pulls him back into the conversation. She then explains that it would be "extremely difficult" for Scott to find alternative employment at the moment. It would be a lot "easier if he could look while he was still working." Duvall won't budge. "Three months." Ellenor offers. Duvall refuses: "I can't do that. The other partners want him gone now." Scott does more trash-talking: "You want me gone." Ellenor chastises him again. Jimmy attempts a left hook: "Certainly eighteen years has got to be worth a little compassion." Harry "Deadpan Alley" Duvall responds, "I'll offer him compassion, but not a position." And that's all she wrote. Oh, wait. It's Scott Wallace we're talking about here, so in that case: blah blah blah forever and evercakes.

The Firm. Jeannie's hanging up her coat and purse on the crowded rack as she tries to placate Lindsay about William "These Are The Dramas Of Our Lives" Hinks. Jeannie thinks he's harmless. Lindsay knows he's not: "Okay." All the members of The Firm start their "serious" sentences with the word "okay." Like the word is supposed to mean they are about to be "very" honest and truthful. Okay? Whatever. Lindsay continues, "William admitted to me and Jimmy that he totally played you." Jeannie furrows her brow. "He knew he had to insist on being guilty for you to be convinced he was delusional." Blah dee blah he knew I'd invoke the insanity plea, blah dee blah he played me too, blah dee blah he did it. Jeannie grabs both Lindsay's shoulders and squeezes. "Lindsay," crackle and crunch go her bones, "this man will go to his grave trying to convince people he's the killer." The bicker about whether or not William is a serial killer. The argument boils down to who knows the serial killer better, the lawyer or the shrink. Toward the end of their bickering, William steps in and asks, "Can I vote?" Both women scream. Lindsay points her finger at him: "Mr. Hinks! I asked you to leave." He steps forward: "Fine. Is there a decent park around here to walk a dog?" Gong goes The Cascade Of Cold Bastards. He continues, "You don't have a dog, do you?" Get out! Lindsay screams again. Jeannie tries to get her to calm down. Jimmy and Ellenor return from their meeting in the middle of this debacle. Jimmy asks what's going on. Freak's response: "Jimmy, hi! Lindsay won't take my business and I could just kill myself. Or someone else." Gong. Gong. Again, Lindsay asks him to leave, and this time she threatens to call the police. Oops, too late, Lucky Lucy has already called them and they are on the way. Lucy attempts to engage William in some verbal battery, but to no avail. He doesn't bite. In fact, he snaps back and recites her address to the tee: "You really should try to buy, you know. You're throwing your money away by renting." Then The Lump becomes The Lean, Mean Fighting Machine as he throws some muscle at Mr. Hinks: "You will leave now or I will physically remove you." Oh, a man in a gaggle of helpless women, what will they ever do? Finally, after hint number eight thousand two hundred and sixty-five, Hinks leaves The Firm.

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The Practice

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