Top Chef
Campfires, Cream Cheese and Countryside

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: C- | 19 USERS: C+
More Farm Than Good

Last week, the judges ousted Michael who made a "bloody eye" that tasted "like cardboard." It was probably the right call. And, that dude was a total chode. Nina is pleased to be rid of him, too. "I'm sorry, boo boo, you're a douche," Nina says. Ahhh yes, Nina, we love you.

Carlos won the last challenge, along with Travis (Captain Vietnam), so he's feeling confident enough to share his backstory. The next day, as the chefs prepare for whatever Padma will throw their way, Sara admits that she has had a bad attitude lately and needs to get out of her head. Shirley agrees that a positive attitude is everything. Sara doesn't want to disappoint her boyfriend of just over a year.

Padma and John Besh roll into the Top Chef apartment together and this is not a normal occurrence. Is it rude to say John Besh has gained a little weight? Maybe it's just that whatever haircut. For the next challenge, Padma tells them to pack an overnight bag. This could mean anything, all the chefs think.

But soon the chefs are wowed by the RAV4 and forget about all their Besh-related worries. A viewer poll asks how great John Besh's hair is on a scale of 0-10 and I'm surprised it even got a half-hearted 5. In true New Orleans spirit, the chefs are getting out of town and going to the country.

In rural Louisiana, the chefs step out onto Covey Rise Farms. It's beautiful and Padma is rocking those Mom Jeans. John Besh greets them and starts talking about a tomato that is only grown in the soils of Louisiana: The Creole Tomato. For the Quickfire challenge, the chefs have 20 minutes to create a dish that showcases the Creole Tomato.

Padma says she brought their pots and pans, and opens the back of the RAV4 very slowly with a remote. It was supposed to look techy and cool but it was about as current as those mom jeans. It would have been better had it been underscored by a slow, long fart.

Justin is excited to show off the tomato's thin skin and high acid levels. The other chefs are like, "tomato … got it." Travis says he feels lost and it's difficult to think outside when the heat and sun are in his face. It's so much easier to think in Vietnam. Stephanie can't think of anything, and Nicholas says anyone who can't come up with a tomato dish in 20 minutes should go home.

Bene keeps making tomato dishes and hopes this one will redeem him. They have started calling him "Bene Tomato," so he'd better deliver. Nina is making a chilled watermelon tomato soup but it's so damn hot on the farm. Patty is working on a salad but the heat is turning it into a hot dish. Stephanie decides on a tomato and watermelon salad with feta and avocado, which pretty much just involves cutting those ingredients and spreading them over a plate. This is something I feel confident I could execute, if not conceptualize. It looks pretty dumb.

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Top Chef




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