Top Chef
Everything's Bigger in Texas

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Kim: B+ | Grade It Now!
Pigs and Rabbits

It's time for Round Two of the Qualifying Challenge! The next nine potential cheftestants walk into the kitchen and find Gail, Tom, and Padma standing there. They also go down the line for introductions. We have: Ty-Lor With An UmLaut No Seriously, Nina From Seattle, Keith Who Looks Like Chef From South Park, Edward the Asian from Kentucky (maybe the only one?), Chris Hollywood Who Is a Culinary Artist (no, he really says that), Janine Who Rips on Chris For Saying He's a Culinary Artist and Becomes My Early Favorite, Chuy The Rick Bayless Protégé, Whitney The Brunette Cynthia Stevenson, and Dakota And That Can't Possibly Be Her Real Name.

Padma explains the challenge: they have a variety of ingredients from which to choose. They must all collectively agree on one ingredient and then each prepare a dish with that ingredient. Time starts, and they all clamor around the table and try to out-chef one another with their choice of ingredient, which includes things like sea urchin and sweetbreads. They finally all agree on rabbit, since it's probably the most versatile.

Everyone gets to cooking. Janine says that "rabbit orgies are awesome." Whuh-huh? Why is she talking about rabbit orgies? Whitney explains that Hugh Acheson has been a mentor for her. Wait, isn't he a judge this season? How is that fair? Also, she says he brought her into the kitchen when she was very young, which just sounds inappropriate. I'm sure it's all aboveboard but any time a young women is taken in by an older man, it sounds weird.

Tom wanders around the kitchen to find out what people are doing. Is he going to send someone home right now, like he did last time? Chuy interviews that his mother used to cook rabbit a lot when he was growing up. Like they raised rabbits and then would eat them for dinner and tell his sister it was chicken. I hope they eventually told her the truth or she just got an ugly surprise. Chris Hollywood interviews that his style is similar to Blais and Michael Voltaggio. I'm sure he thinks he's just like Michael Voltaggio. We shall see. Ty-Lor has been all around the world. Is that where he picked up the umlaut? And the fake name. I hope his birth name is at least Tyler.

Janine explains that she's going to make a rack of rabbit, I guess? She doesn't seem to have much of a plan. In her interview, she explains that she lost her father and broke up with her partner of nine years this year, so being on the show would be something positive. She's also one of those people who doesn't open her mouth when she speaks, and swallows her words, which is going to bug me if she makes it on the show. Open your mouth! Stop mumbling! Edward is trying to use one of the machines but he's not familiar with the controls and he decides to skip it. Will that ruin his dish?

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Top Chef




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