Top Chef

Episode Report Card
Kim: A | Grade It Now!
Buy Me Some Peanuts and…Tuna Tartare?

Angelo had "bigger fish to fry," so he made chile-crusted fried tilapia satay with Asian tartar sauce, sambal, and sriracha. Angelo gives the judges a really over-involved description of how he cooked his food and the judges have no comment. And finally, Amanda had "the big cheese," and she made macaroni and cheese with bacon and jalapenos with a pork chop on the side. What kind of cheese did she use? That would be interesting to know. Oh, gruyere and smoked mozzarella. Kind of boring.

Rick says that his least favorite dishes were Kelly's dish, which didn't sing to him, and Amanda's dish, which he calls "a sledge hammer to the gut." Amanda interviews that this time she disagrees, and she thinks her dish was really good. So all the other times, she thought her dish sucked? And then she goes into this mock pity party and it's so annoying that I want her instantly off my screen, like I wish this challenge suddenly turned into a surprise elimination challenge and she was gone. Because she is SO ANNOYING and childish and I can't take watching her much longer.

So who were the favorites? Rick says that one of his top choices was Kevin, with his bacon dish. Angelo shoots daggers. He didn't make an easily-frozen dish, even though those were not at all the rules!! Rick also liked Ed's dish, which he thinks was light and tasty. And the winner is Ed! Probably because frozen gnocchi are a lot more palatable than frozen poached eggs.

And now it's time for the Elimination Challenge to be revealed: they have to create fine dining versions of ballpark food at the Washington Nationals' game. Angelo, who is somehow an expert on everything, explains that he's an expert in baseball because he's half Dominican. And he still thinks he might be a professional baseball player. Well, I think he's about the same age as most Dominican Little Leaguers, from what I've seen, so that could work out. Padma adds that they have to work as a team and create at least six dishes. So why are they working as a team? I guess because they'll be selling at a concession stand instead of at individual tables or carts? Amanda remembers how poorly things went the last time they had to work as a team, so she's not looking forward to it.

Time starts, and they have fifteen minutes for planning. Kelly immediately steps up and starts giving out her ideas while everyone else is silent. Tiffany interviews that she thinks Kelly might be trying to take control. In fact, Amanda speaks up and says that she wants to cook crab and Kelly is like, "Um, I'm doing crabcake, so you can't. Make something else." She's nicer about it, but that's the message I get. And that Amanda apparently gets too, because she backs down and agrees to do seafood instead of shellfish. Amanda interviews that Kelly is always thinking of herself. Because... it's an individual competition? And as the estimable Sars used to say, this is Top Chef, not Top Montessori School? I don't know if Amanda gets that.

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Top Chef




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