Top Chef
Season 1 Restaurant Wars

Episode Report Card
Keckler: B | Grade It Now!
I'm Not Your Bitch, Bitch

Dave explains his very simple, and very completed restaurant concept to Colicchio. Stephen continues to randomly carry around Jeroboams of Veuve. Dave and Stephen tack up their restaurant menus. It looks as though the restaurants will have prix fixe menus with no options other than what I've already described. Oh, I see, the "Tapas Trio" is the appetizer for Sabor, and the red snapper on paella cake is the main, and the olive oil ice cream (yum!) is the dessert. I've grasped it now.

Diners arrive and sit where they want. Some diners like the brown paper covering the tables, they think it's "homey." Do you all put brown paper on your dining room table? I know I don't. Dave hyperspazedly explains that they are doing family style because their food is about socializing and meeting and greeting other people. Stephen ponces around with his wine and spouts that the rosé Cava he has is very rare because they don't make a lot of rosé Cavas. Huh, my experiences have taught me otherwise, and I've never even been to Spain. As other diners wait to be seated, Stephen actually goes into the actual wine-making process for rosés with the two women he is addressing. Stephen, I don't know why you go to extremes. Too high or too low, there ain't no in between. It's clear that American Workshop is well underway and getting into food service. Still, Stephen holds up the dining room (the back of the house wonders where he is) and over-explains stuff. Lee Anne is getting really stressed and finally yells at Stephen that they will start running the food for Stephen if he doesn't get his act together. Stephen tries to defend himself to us but it's a really weak argument. Lee Anne orders him to please take food out. She then touches the plate and exclaims, "They're cold!" "It's madness out there," Stephen says. No, it's not, you garlic bulb! Dave ably handles their patrons. People really seem to like it. "The other team's concept is totally a style that I would not engage in, you know it's very warming, welcoming, very comfortable," Stephen says. That's right, Stephen, no one would ever accuse you of being welcoming or comfortable. He says Sabor is on the opposite spectrum. Stephen blathers that their food was outstanding and that he wanted the dining room to reflect "the art that was to come out of the kitchen." Some of the diners seem happy, and say, "It was worth the wait." Diners at American Workshop wonder if the fancy-dancy tuna tartar meshes with the homey roast chicken.

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