Top Chef
Unhappy Customers

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C+ | Grade It Now!
Foaming at the Mouth

Mallrats are seated. Ted Ilan presents some of his patrons with a small bowl of olives. There's some discussion about what to do with an olive pit at one table. Finally, the guy just leaves it on the table. THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER. Mallrats at Lalalina eat the fried meatball on toast with parsley pesto. Someone comments that they now have somewhere to put their olive pit. On the meatball's plate, not the meatball. Some of Lalalina's mallrats are caught discussing whether they want red or white wine, which obviously will come back to bite Lalalina when their teetotaling ways are discovered.

The judges walk in and seat themselves. Cliff tells us that he took his front of the house duties very seriously. We get shots of him checking in on M.E.C.'s mallrats countered with shots of the judges being obviously impatient at not being waited on. Cliff admits to us that maybe he took on a bit too much what with how difficult it is to take the orders and serve the food in a timely manner. M.E.C.'s server explains the menu to the judges. In the back, Marcel and Elia are cooking, and Marcel tells us he's not happy with the way Cliff was expediting the orders. Apparently, the judges have been waiting ten minutes for their drinks before Cliff finally arrives to pour out beer and root beer. Bravo also makes it look like the judges had nothing to say to each other during that entire time. I wouldn't blame M.E.C. for that; maybe the judges are just really boring people. Of course, when they do talk, it's to be snarky: "So, how long does a wing take to cook?" Yakura asks in the tone of "How many recappers does it take to screw in a light bulb?" "A loooong tiiime," Padmadala says. "Yeah. A. Single," Gail says, referring to the fact that they're being cooked and served a single drumstick. That's sort of faulty logic, actually. It's not like the entire dining room is being served "A. Single." drumstick that they will be splitting, so shut up a bit, Gail. Colicchio doesn't say anything, he just shrugs expressively as if there's nothing left to be said. I think he wore out his snark during the Sniff 'n' Sneer.

In the back of M.E.C., Elia reminds Cliff, "I need to know how they want their burger." In the back of Lalalina, Son of Sam teaches Mike something about the pork loin. Ted Ilan brings out Lalalina's second course of linguini (Bravo's graphics originally called it "spaghetti" when the teams were grocery shopping. Two different pastas, Bravo. This is a food show, get with it!) with walnut-parsley pesto and roasted mushrooms. A Lalalina mallrat notes, "Mushrooms are salty and way overdone." "Oily," one of her dining companions observes. In the back, Mike asks Sam something about more pork chops. "Yeah, I thought you did?" Sam responds and then we cut to him demanding, "Where's my meatball?" I don't think I want to answer that. Mike tells us that "Sam's freaking out a little bit." We get shots of Sam explaining more to Mike about how to cook something. Reminding us that he's a line cook and Sam's an executive chef, Mike says that he'll be a team player if that's a good way to survive in a team challenge. Yeah, but you can't be a drag on the team either, Mike. Back in Lalalina's kitchen, Mike is still acting incompetent and Sam is still annoyed. Sam tells us that he's been helping Mike along the way because he likes him, but he's tired of telling him how to do everything.

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