Twin Peaks
Episode One

Episode Report Card
Something's Fishy

This scene makes me giggle more than a few times. Over at the Double R, Truman suggests to Cooper that he try a piece of their delicious cherry pie, and Shelley runs off to get it. Truman offers Cooper the quick low-down on Shelley and her trucker husband. After Cooper comments on the fact that he still cannot get the taste of the fish-laden coffee out of his mouth, they both spot the Log Lady sitting alone at the other end of the bar. Word-for-word transcription follows:

Cooper: Log Lady.
Truman: Right.
Cooper: Can I ask her about her log?
Truman: Many have.

Norma arrives and introduces herself to Cooper. We discover that Laura volunteered as part of a Meals on Wheels program, organized through the diner, in which she helped deliver "hot meals to elderly shut-ins." Cooper requests a copy of the list of people on her route and "two more pieces of this incredible pie." The Log Lady walks over to the two men, and more verbatim greatness which I could never fully do justice ensues:

Log Lady: My log saw something that night.
Cooper: What did it see?
Log Lady: Ask it.
[Glacial pause befitting perhaps any activity better than waiting for a grown man to interrogate a big ol' hunk of lumber.]
Log Lady: I thought so.
[Exit Log Lady. Raucous applause.]

See that, I couldn't even do it justice when I transcribed it verbatim. Trust me. It's a winner.

Over at that happy, happy domestic dwelling that is the Johnson house, Leo is in the process of slicing a deflated football open when he hears Norma dropping Shelley off. Hiding his arts-and-crafts project on top of the refrigerator for later use, Leo walks over to the sink and places a bar of soap into a sock and advances on her with the threat, "Where's my shirt?" What shirt? The blue one. He tells her he's going to "teach her a lesson," and he turns on the radio and swings the homespun weapon above his head until it's moving fast enough to really, really hurt her. And speaking of strange meetings in the home, over at the Hayward place, Donna is stepping out with her baby, as James has dropped by for dinner with her and Donna's parents. After introducing himself to her parents, they are left alone for a moment and Donna promises they can "talk after dinner." Outside the house, though, Mike and Bobby pull up in Mike's vintagemobile, and Mike correctly observes, "First your girlfriend, then mine," as a pissed-as-hell Bobby finally gets around to smoking that cigarette he garnished his mother's dinner with just a few short hours before.

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Twin Peaks




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