When I imagine the pitch for the Hills spin-off The City, it goes a little something like this:

Hey, I have a great idea! So how about we take the boringest character? From the boringest reality show? And make a show about her? It's sure to be a non-stop thrill ride, not to mention a ratings bonanza!

Ugh! Stupid TV producers cashing in on The Devil Wears Prada all over the damned place. Why now for the love of Gucci? Hot on the heels -- see what I did there? -- of a spate of fashion mag-related reality shows (see Stylista and Vogue's web series Model.Live) comes news that the Style Network will host a new show called .... wait for it ... Running In Heels, which will provide a fascinating in-depth look at what goes on behind closed doors in the esteemed offices of ... wait for it... Marie Claire. I mean, don't get me wrong, I've flipped through Marie Claire a coupla times and it's totally a fine magazine. But I sort of file it in the same category as Redbook, i.e. lady mags for the over-forty soccer mom set. You know what I mean -- like, it's something I'll pick up in the airport if I've already read Vogue and Elle and Allure and all the gossip rags and I'm desperate for something amusing and girly and mind-numbingly vapid.

Yes, if you were into taking all the joy out of everything, it'd be pretty easy to spoil all of the (non)action that takes place on the upcoming season of The Hills merely by paying marginal attention to the tabloids. Because god knows not a week goes by that we aren't informed of Speidi's latest exploits or LC's latest frenemy. The truth is that this is a show on which nothing much really ever happens. But that's why the show so successfully captures the zeitgeist: the beauty lies not in the substance of what happens or doesn't happen, but in the style in which the nothing-happening is couched.

Someone out at America's Next Top Model, but before you celebrate: It's not Tyra.