The Telefile
Jennifer Lopez’s <I>Real</I> Diva Demands for <I>Idol</I>

There are reports that in order to get her to judge American Idol next season, Jennifer Lopez had a laundry list of demands that went far beyond a hefty sum of cash. The latest news is that she may be getting $12 million -- a tidy chunk of change for sitting on her butt and telling people that they are pitchy for a few months -- but not the deal to do more Fox shows and movies that she supposedly wanted. Nor, we're guessing, does her contract include any of the below provisions that she may have been tempted to ask for:

No "Don't Want to Miss a Thing"... Ever
Though it might be in Steven Tyler's contract to have this song from Armageddon played multiple times a season, Ms. Lopez would want nothing on that show that has any association with any Ben Affleck movie.

A New Pair of Louboutins for Every Episode
She had that song about the expensive shoes but it didn't do well, so instead of paying for them out of pocket, she may have wanted Idol to foot the bill.

Jennifer Lopez Night
Obviously, so she could tell the wannabes how much better she would have done it.

Marc Anthony Night
Any opportunity to gush about her amazing husband.

First Pick of Wardrobe Choices
God forbid anyone look better than her. And naturally, she'd want to have a team of folks dedicated to her hair and makeup.

No Diddy Songs
Remember when he was Puff Daddy? Remember when J.Lo dated him and then there was that whole gun incident? Yeah. She doesn't like to think about that.

Age Limit Reduced
Significantly reduced. To two, so that the Lopez/Anthony twin child prodigies could compete.

No Contestants from Boston
After Affleck, Lopez can't stand people who drop their r's. New judge Steven Tyler started out in Beantown, but he's barely comprehensible in general with all the screaming, so that shouldn't be a problem.

An Extra Seat for Marc at the Judges Table
Anthony wouldn't actually have been an official part of the judging panel or anything like that, but she would want him to sit by her so everyone can see just how in love they are.

Must Personally Mentor Anyone from the Bronx
Who cares about the rest of the singers? Anyone hailing from J.Lo's hometown would receive special lessons on how to maintain their roots while becoming an international sensation.

Each Results Show Must Involve her Dancing
This former Fly Girl would have to be able to show off her moves at any given opportunity. Say hello to new Ford commercials with her shaking her ass.

No Biting Comments from Seacrest
The host would not allowed to make comments about the irony of her still claiming to be from "the streets" while wearing chinchilla, or make any derogatory remarks about her husband looking like a skeleton.

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The Telefile

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