The Telefile

Christina Applegate Will Survive

by Lauren Gitlin August 19, 2008 4:00 pm
Christina Applegate Will Survive Man, Christina Applegate has been dealt a load of you-know-what in her thirty-six years. She spent the first part of her career establishing herself as a dumb ho in Married With Children and Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead, and the rest of it up to now trying to prove that she is the polar opposite. Add to that a not-so-fun divorce from Blue Steel-lookin' hubby Johnathon Schaech and a plagued Broadway debut (she took that whole break a leg thing sort of literally). But things were starting to look up! She killed in Anchorman as an able comedic sparring partner with Will Ferrell, and even had some success with a new ABC sitcom Samantha Who? (Full disclosure -- I kind of love that show.) So when the poor darlin' announced she had boob cancer, my heart went out to her.

Everywhere you look today, there's news that she's taken the most extreme precautions possible to ensure her health -- a double mastectomy. It's a ballsy (boobsy?) thing to do when your ta-ta's are a large part of what makes you a bankable entity, and one that she's approaching with the kind of cheery humor that's astounding in the face of such grim prospects. Appearing on The Today Show earlier today, she joked, "I'm going to have cute boobs 'til I'm 90, so there's that. I'll have the best boobs in the nursing home. I'll be the envy of all the ladies around the bridge table."

Certainly she won't be the first actress to go under the knife for boob-related surgery, but clearly this is a little different. I'm just glad she's got such an optimistic spin on things. It reminds me of that scene in The Sweetest Thing (full disclosure #2: it's a really good movie you guys!) where she sees a lady staring at her silicon-enhanced knockers and encourages the chick to feel her up to prove the natural feel of her goodies. Classic, if creepily foreshadowing. Here's lookin' at you Christina! Go ahead with your sassy cancer-fighting self! May you and your faux boobs live long and prosper.




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